what miracle

Each week a new struggle emerging from the constant chaos. something dark in her severe beautiful expression that separates us, keeps her and us from healing.
O, bring us back to some place in our hearts when we could see things as if each of us were human:
And if it was never good, how did we make someone so good out of it? And why all the smiles in the pictures?
No: I never set out to hurt you, and yes, there was the damage unto you from me and my self-immolation,
but things we didn’t need on both sides brought us here:
things we kept hidden from the light thinking it would shrivel and die as instead it festered and grewover our souls like mildew–
will we ever shake this off us now?
what miracle could save this?